I rediscovered this from my days as a Customer Service Rep for an internet company.
I do not like making more quotes.
Can you fax it to my mom?
Do you people ship to Guam?
Would you, could you, ship it faster?
Would you, could you, add the casters?
I do not like to ship three day.
I cannot do it anyway.
You refused this damaged-twice box?
Did your brand new table splinter?
Did you order this last winter?
Did you tell us ‘pack it well’?
It’s got a snowball’s chance in Hell.”
January 10, 2008 at 4:33 pm
January 10, 2008 at 6:25 pm
here’s the one you put on my blog from our temping days:
Do you need me to fetch tea?
Do you want me not to pee?
Can I tell you to fuck off
And disguise it with a cough?
Would you do it with your boss?
Would you, if you might get caught?
I would not, could not do my boss
I would not, and it is his loss
I Heard Tell
January 10, 2008 at 7:24 pm
Didn’t your boss at that company elope to Vegas some weekend? Where was I temping when I wrote that, the Synagogue? Ah, sweet rhymey blasphemy.
January 11, 2008 at 1:26 pm
large print books
Do you need a phone call from George Foreman?
Do you want us to braille the Book of Mormon?
What do you mean “Take her off your mailing list,
She’s now a corpse, man!”?
Is this our life dear Molly?
Is this our life, so far from jolly?
I think it is by golly,
I think it is our folly.
I Heard Tell
January 11, 2008 at 5:07 pm
Donn, your genius frightens me. Also, my Mom loved your poem. She called me to tell me.