I have a new all-time favorite Simpson’s quote, from the episode where Homer tries to become an inventor like Thomas Edison:
Homer: “What have I done with my life? I’m 38 years old and I only have three memories! Waiting in line at the movies, getting a key made, and this conversation we’re having right now!”
I don’t know why this struck me as so funny and true, but it made me laugh throughout the entire rest of the episode, and then later on that evening it made me go, ‘what line was I laughing about so much, earlier? Oh, yeah!’ and then laugh for 10 more minutes.
What are your favorite Simpson’s quotes?
I Heard Tell 
Anne
“Can’t sleep, clowns’ll eat me”- Bart. I find that it’s a universal enough sentiment to be appropriate in any situation!
T Love
Milhouse, when Otto is driving the school bus like a maniac: “This is just like Speed 2, only on a bus instead of a boat!”
michael
“To alcohol! The cause of, and solution to, all of life’s problems.” -Homer
stone
“i bent my wookiee.”
Matthew
Homer: Don’t worry son, I’ll build you a new treehouse, one so grand that it will be an affront to God himself.
Bart: Can it have a rope ladder that you can pull up after you?
Homer: Only if it’s an affront to God…
Johanna
The speech at Bart and Lisa’s graduation from military school:
“The wars of the future will not be fought on the battlefield or at sea. They will be fought in space, or possibly on top of a very tall mountain. In either case, most of the actual fighting will be done by small robots. And as you go forth today remember always your duty is clear: To build and maintain those robots.”
Lydia
Bart (to Lisa, who is feeling blue): Milhouse likes you.
Lisa: Milhouse likes Vaseline on toast.